Therapy for Men: An Informed Guide to Wellbeing

Written by Gold Tree Therapy's Registered Psychologist, Goldie Hamilton, 2nd February 2026

Men often seek therapy to gain deeper insights and navigate life’s challenges more effectively. Perhaps you’ve considered therapy yourself but hesitated to take the next step, or you’ve noticed someone close to you who could benefit from professional guidance. This article explores the unique pressures men face, addresses common concerns about asking for help, highlights the benefits of therapy, and empowers you to take informed steps towards wellbeing.

Understanding the Pressures Men Navigate

Men today face a multitude of pressures that can impact their wellbeing. These may include:

• The struggle to balance work and personal life
• Relationship challenges or feelings of isolation or lack of belonging
• Difficulty reconciling personal experiences with societal expectations
• Concerns about causing harm or being misunderstood
• Experiences with intense anger, substance use, or suicidal thoughts
• Challenges in expressing distress and seeking support

Therapy offers a supportive and non-judgemental environment to explore these pressures, develop healthy coping strategies, and move towards a more grounded and empowered life.

Addressing Men’s Concerns About Therapy

It's natural to have questions or hesitations about starting therapy. Here are some common concerns men raise:

“I find it difficult to ask for help”: Societal expectations and personal experiences can influence how comfortable men feel reaching out. You might feel pressure to handle everything independently or worry about sharing aspects of yourself that feel unexpected or unwelcome. Therapy provides a unique environment, separate from daily societal and personal expectations, where you can move beyond concerns about perceptions and explore your authentic self.

“I don’t feel comfortable talking about my emotions”: A common concern is that therapy demands a level of emotional openness that feels unnatural. In reality, therapy doesn't require you to speak in any specific way. Some sessions involve talking, while others involve reflection, problem-solving, or simply observing your thoughts. You don't need to have all the answers or force yourself to feel anything on demand. Silence, uncertainty, and gradual exploration are all welcome.

The Transformative Benefits of Therapy

Therapy can provide a dedicated and supportive space to:

• Gain clarity and think through challenges more effectively
• Express yourself openly and without fear of judgement
• Identify and understand recurring patterns in your life
• Develop healthy coping strategies and new ways of responding to situations
• Increase your steadiness and resilience through difficult times
• Define your priorities and create positive change

Finding the Right Therapist for You

The key to successful therapy is finding a therapist you can trust and feel comfortable with. Consider these factors:

• Reputable: Ensure the therapist is a registered mental health professional, such as with the NZ Psychologists Board. You may wish to seek recommendations from your GP or other trusted sources.
• Approach and Expertise: Explore whether the therapist's approach and skills align with your needs and preferences. A therapist with experience working with men will be mindful of the unique difficulties they face, recognising that many men carry these burdens quietly. They will strive to create a space that feels thoughtful, respectful, and grounded, and prioritise confidentiality, non-judgement, and understanding your experiences within the context of your life and values.
• Online or In-Person Support: Consider whether you'd prefer to meet your therapist in person or remotely via video or phone call. In-person support can be best for children, people at risk of suicide, and those without a personal phone or computer. Online therapy can be a good fit for those seeking extra flexibility and privacy, with limited time, travel difficulties or in regions with fewer services, or comfort speaking from their own space. Reflecting on your options and personal preferences can help guide you towards support that will best meet your needs.

Additional Support Resources

Consider helpful resources beyond therapy. Whether you're looking for immediate support (helplines at findahelpline.com), community connection (local groups, Men's Shed), or helpful information (Gold Tree resources), there are many ways to support your wellbeing.

Frequently Asked Questions

• Is therapy confidential? Yes, therapy is confidential, with clear ethical and legal boundaries. It's always a good idea to discuss confidentiality policies with your therapist.
• Do I have to talk about my emotions? No, you can approach emotional topics gradually and at your own pace. Therapy adapts to you, not the other way around.
• Is therapy only for times of crisis? No, therapy can support personal growth and resilience, even when life feels manageable.
• Is online therapy effective? Yes, research shows that online therapy can be very effective, and some find it more comfortable and convenient.
• Does the therapist’s gender matter? Preferences vary, and it’s the quality of the therapeutic relationship that matters most. What's important is that your therapist helps you feel understood, respected, and able to engage openly.

Taking the Next Step

As a psychologist with experience supporting men, I've seen firsthand how societal expectations can prevent them from seeking help and how transformative therapy can be when they take the empowered step to reach out. I encourage you to explore the resources mentioned in this article, engage with the insights shared in the FAQ section, and consider reaching out to a therapist for a consultation. Investing in your mental health is a powerful step towards a more fulfilling life.